Twenty-sixth (Bataan)

I actually have another post scheduled to write today but I just can't shake the feeling that I HAVE to write about my birthday first. This has been a week late already (always happens with all of my other posts however monumental they might be) and I should really stop with the habit of posting memories years behind the moment itself so here I am.

(I made this self-imposed rule to stop putting too many 'haha's' in my blog posts and one paragraph down and I'm already flinching on how many times I've wanted to type it out, haha! Forgive me.)

Anyway, this year has been special even from the very start and I knew my birthday wouldn't be different.


I've been planning it way back in March although I didn't really get into the major details until... well, May, my birthmonth itself. Part of the reason was because I've been really busy with work five days a week and sleeping on the rest of it. My brother also got married last April (yay!) so everybody at home were pretty occupied. Nevertheless, I knew I wanted to do something different this year instead of the usual dine out and quiet birthdays I had in the past so through the help of my mom and my sister, we managed to push it through.

We decided to spend my birthday on a beach in Bataan. I got my mom do the computations and my sister search for reviews. We settled with the beach my sister went to with her friends on her birthday, Stella Mariz Resort. It was beautiful from the pictures my sister have uploaded and I was even informed it was far from other resorts so the chances that it'll be too crowded would be low. So that's it, we have the venue.

We had a little pre-birthday celebration on the eve of the 14th. My nephew, Boy, was celebrating his 20th birthday so Mama cooked pancit for him. Back in the day, since our birthdays are just a day apart, we used to celebrate it together be it at a beach or a kid's party held at the front yard of their old house in Pangasinan. I spent most of my childhood summers in Pangasinan so needless to say, I spent most of my birthdays there as well.

I especially requested a karaoke machine for that evening, as I haven't sung enough the last time we had one. Plus it contained a large number of my current favorite songs (from One Direction to Little Mix to Selena Gomez to Taylor Swift) so I made it a point to sing as many songs as I can. My friends who would join the trip (there's 13 of us including my family and friends) were bound to arrive in the evening, each of them coming from work so I had plenty of time to hog the mic as much as I want lol.

My parents bought me a cake, which they told everyone was for me and Boy but well, my full name written across it said otherwise. I don't remember the last time I had a cake with my name written on it actually but I do know when was the last one I had my full name iced on (I was 2.)

Full name! Thanks Ma and Pa! x

My family and a couple of neighbors and friends sang me happy birthday, with Mama repeatedly telling me to blow out the candle while everybody's taking pictures. I got to make a wish in a haste, which was a really funny one actually (of course it's a secret.)

Screencapped from a video! Photo by Ap

My friends arrived really late because two of them were coming from Manila and others decided to wait up so they could go together. Eventually, Michael and Gilbert got tired of waiting so they were at ours first, followed by Faye, Tere and Rashelle who met up at Malolos. We were almost complete saved for Triselle, who's currently in Taiwan, but it felt so much fun to have (almost) all your friends back together and realize nothing much has changed even if we haven't seen each other in a long time.

Sleepover!

We were supposed to be travelling at 3 a.m. but there had been problems with communicating with the driver that held us back a few minutes. My friends found our college yearbook which they took time going over the familiar faces we met in the five years we were in uni. Our major was far back in the back of the year book that when we were nearing it, the van arrived. Michael brought the book nevertheless, saying he would look it up while we're in the van.

Pass 3 in the morning and we're on the road (again. Sorry, I can't help it.)

It took us three hours to get to Bataan. Arriving at Stella Mariz, I noticed that it was indeed far from other resorts and I was relieved as I've been worrying about overcrowded beaches especially that my birthday coincided with a weekend. That relief was short lived though because to our dismay, we arrived at the resort and found a lot of tents set up around the area, no available cottage in sight and a personnel telling us they're fully booked for the day. I would admit that it did make me upset, a tad, but I don't really want to ruin my day and for people to feel sorry for me when it's not even their fault. We decided to check on the other beaches.

There was a row of resorts at Bagac, which pretty much tells you what I've been worried about. The first ones were already fully booked that led us to the very last resort (lol, the pun) at the end of the line. It wasn't as pretty nor as inviting as Stella Mariz would have been. But we're here and it would take a few more hours to travel to other places so it would have to do.

It was very crowded. The cottages itself were full and there were karaoke machines left and right. We couldn't even pick a spot to take pictures because there would be people swimming or playing in the background. It was a let down of what I had in my head but then again, I don't want to be in a bad mood on my birthday and luckily so did my friends.

We decided to take a stroll around the area and find a place we could at least take pictures at. We took a couple of shots with my 2 and 6 balloon (my age, ugh) and some group pictures. That's where we met a bangkero who offered a trip across the sea to a cliff diving spot and white sand beach for 1200php good for 12 people.

My sister had told me beforehand to decline offers like this as they've tried it before (back in Stella Mariz on her birthday) and it wasn't worth the money. But we didn't really have anything to do on the resort so we decided to push through it, all six of us occupying one boat with my cousin and my nephew joining in. My parents stayed behind to cook our lunch while my sister passed up as she'd seen it before.

We took enough money for the boat fare and a couple of extras because we're told some places we'll be visiting would require a fee, my friend Rashelle's phone for pictures and off we went. The boat ride was quiet, though I doubt we would actually hear anything above the sound of the machine roaring behind us. It was a good thing we didn't bring any device aside from Shelle who had her phone secured in Gilbert's phone ziplock because the boat ride would definitely get you wet.

The first stop was the cliff. There were a lot of people there, either lining up to jump, already swimming below or watching from the rocks. Faye, Michael, Gilbert and my nephew Boy decided to try while the rest of us were left on the rocks to watch.

There was a girl standing on the edge of the cliff when we arrived. She kept on breathing in and out, standing there and looking at the water she would eventually dive in  and then seconds later, she'd take a step behind and sit back down. A couple of jumpers offered to leap with her, which she accepted but over again, she'd be shaking her head and going back to her corner. It cost about five to seven minutes to swim from where we were to climb at the top of the cliff so I witnessed how much time it took for the girl to contemplate right there, how many people have jumped, how many have cheered. My friend Faye even volunteered to jump with the girl as well but all four of my friends have dove and we're set to go and the girl still stood on the edge, breathing in and out, waiting for that little spark of courage.

I never learnt how to swim, most of it due to the fact that I was always scared to get drown and that I've never really had that sense of adventure in me even back when I was a kid. There were life vests provided by the bangkeros which assured people they wouldn't drown. The girl was wearing one, all of us did. I think it was Tere who said she should just back out if she couldn't do it and suddenly I was rooting for her.  I know it's tough and that she's feeling very, very afraid. But if she got the guts to stand at the edge of the cliff, the mere thought that she wanted to try, that's enough of a start ain't it? Not anyone would be brave enough to just as much as consider something they were unsure of. But the girl stood there, albeit hesitant, and that itself was a glimpse of bravery I knew she had in her.

On the boat ride to our next stop, I thought of the cliff. Of how it's a representation of the things I feared. Of the things I let pass because I was afraid of the outcome, because I wasn't sure of what will happen next. I've always been the type of person who wanted everything to go according to plan, no matter how much I deny it. I hate surprises, hate getting off guard and being unable to figure what to do next. I don't like having no control. There were things, chances and opportunities I let go because I was afraid to step out of my comfort zone, because I didn't want to fail, didn't want to get hurt.

But I thought of the people jumping off the cliff, of my friend Faye shouting in bliss once she ascended from the cold water, of the crowd cheering for the people up there, of the girl one leap closer in conquering her fear.

And I realized I want to do that, I want to jump off the cliff and feel the rush of it. I want to do many other things. I want to stop being afraid. I want to start taking risks.

I know that's easier said than done.

White sand beach and clear blue sea!

The second stop was an island with a white sand beach. It costed 100php per head, with pretty cottages and hammocks tied on trees. It was definitely a stark contrast of the beach we've been in, only a few people swimming around compared to the crowd gathered on the other. It was beautiful and the water was cold and clear. We enjoyed the dip and took as many pictures as we could. Unfortunately, we only got to spend an hour in it and we had to go back.

Beach don't kill our vibe

Loving the tan-effect going on in this picture

We ate lunch and had siesta. It was awfully hot and none of us was in the mood to swim anymore that by 2 in the afternoon we decided to pack up and leave the resort. Mt. Samat was nearby and we had so much free time so we figured paying a visit wouldn't hurt.

Dambana ng Kagitingan at Mt. Samat, Pilar, Bataan

It takes too many jumps to make the perfect shot. Parang pag-ibig. Charot.

The view was great and we had so much fun taking pictures and jump shots but what fascinated me the most was the museum and the history behind the place. I've been very intrigued with Philippine wars and controversies surrounding our heroes ever since watching Heneral Luna that seeing the pictures and stories that occurred during World War II had me engrossed. Papa shared the same sentiment apparently, talking about the Japanese occupation even if he wasn't born that time while Mama was busy taking pictures.

There's a gallery of our heroes and former presidents right before you enter the museum. I took this one solely for Antonio Luna lol

The electricity was down so although I wanted to stay and take time looking at every display, I chose to head out and breathe. I tried to take decent photos as much as I could, though the amount of tourists taking pictures beside the displays made it impossible for me to take better angles.

We are a very cute family

The day wasn't that exhausting but I found myself asleep for most of the ride home. I felt like I took too much time taking pictures instead of making memories and that part I regret. Even so, the day itself gave me some thoughts to ponder.

I am twenty-six now, considered to be in my late 20s, full-time adult and way passed legal lol. I still act very childish sometimes, get incredibly immature and irrational when I'm frustrated and pissed off. I still tend to shy away from problems, hold back from confrontations only to regret the things I didn't say. I still feel lost at times and get scared being out there, exposed and afraid to take that first leap. I'm nowhere near The Novel I'm supposed to write. I'm basically just starting to build the person I want to become.

But I knew how to not let a bad thing ruin a special day, or any other day for that matter. I knew how to make the most of what I have. I have a job I love right now. I pay my own bills, shop my own meals. I start wearing clothes I've always wanted to try. I've become health-conscious not just for the sake of losing weight but to stay fit. I try to write as much as my schedule permit, see my family as much as I can.

I'm halfway through my twentys but I still got a long way to go when it comes to making myself a better person. I make mistakes, I'll continue to make mistakes but I'm working on making those something I've got to learn from rather than something I would regret.

I want to take risks, to take that first leap, to begin taking pictures engraved in my memory rather than a space in my phone's gallery. I want to spend time with people who actually mattered, those who I didn't need to impress or to please because they would accept me for everything I've got. I want to be happy and content. I want to be a better me.

2016 is already halfway through but my 26th is just starting. It's a long shot, but I'm determined to make this year my very best yet.

My favorite people in the world